mine and mine alone…

this is the sambungan from my prev post.. so kalau nak baca, start from the last post ok..

now it’s time for me to start telling about my youth in jasin..
but, i cant start on jasin just yet.. cos i only attended jasin on 14 of april.. i spent 4 months or so at sek wangsa maju 2 before jasin..
there were some memories i believe worth mentioning..
erm, one of them is..
at the age of 16, we were  a lil more matured than before.. no more bashing people up for not giving us money.. no more stealing.. no more punkor..
we started hanging out at playground and played guitar there.. i did not play or learn to play.. tu pasal aku tak reti main sampai sekarang.. my frens asked me to buy a gitar kapok worth around rm100 at that time.. tapi i just din want to..
plus i’d be leaving for jasin.. i thot it wudve been a waste.. but i was totally wrong.. had i bothered to spend just rm100 on that blardy gitar, i cudve played that damn thing now.. sekarang saper yg rugi?? mereka dan keluarga mereka..
ceh!! salah line pulak…

anyhoots, that’s what we used to do.. lepak petang2, then balik maghrib..malam tu around 11 pegi balik melepak ngn dak2 ni.. bosan lepak kat playground, pegi minum kat brj, tgk bola and so on.. then i’m off to jasin.. i din keep in touch with my frens at wangsa maju. so i barely know about them and what they’r up to.. until now..
what a waste..
tapi at that time i knew "boy" or his name is mohd zuhairy ibrahim had already started working as a banquet waiter at hotel mutiara.. sekarang known as crowne plazza kl.. dekat area depan klcc tu..
then he got awfully loaded, he bought a motosikal using his own money.. then he became mat rempit..eh, naper aku becerita pasal die lak ni??

when i was in jasin i thot, if i din come here(jasin), i wudve had a bike by now..
sunnguh keji pemikiran aku time tu.. sanggup give up jasin for a silly moto kapcai.. but i’m glad i din quit jasin.. the memories i gained there is just priceless.. no money in the world can buy it.. and for that, i am utterly grateful..

ok2, now i’ll start on jasin..
arriving on selasa 14 april 2003.. it was my 1st time coming to a boarding school.. everything was so new to me.. but i prepared myself a lil.. tapi obviously, it was not good enuf.. i din know i wud have to bangun pagi at 5.30am everyday..then semayang kat surau, pegi rollcall pagi.. baru gi kelas..
and the toilets in jasin.. they were awful.. tu pon baru renovate dah macam hanjing… pasal renovation tu la kitorang dak2 jasin masuk lambat.. bulan 4 baru masuk..
and the fact that we registered in very late, there were a lot of catching up to do.. sumer subjek ada kuliah.. kelas kena compress gila2 babi..
bayangkan ar.. 6 bulan punya belajar kena belajar dalam sebulan jer.. pasal final exam sem 1 was somewhen around mid of may.. gila babi.. aku nyer results sem 1 sungguh hancor.. aku failed add math..
that was the 1st time i ever failed a subject.. babi!! but it was a lesson learnt.. tapi sem2 aku nyer results improved ar..

aku rasa aku nak citer pasal academic performance dulu, then baru pasal citer lain time kat jasin ni..
sem 1 aku teruk.. pointer aku 2.82 sahaja.. tapi sem 2 dah ok sikit.. naik jadi 3.28.. muahahaha.. time ni bangga gila pasal aku dapat beat WONG si istidraj tu..dier dapat 3.26 kalau tak silap aku..
then time f5, 1st sem tu ar yg aku paling gempak.. aku dapat str8 A.. ni sumer jasa budak "kak, air bikarbonat satu"… atau nama sebanarnyer mohd fadhli bin aper aku tak igt..
taktau la caner aku leh jadi power time f5.. mungkin aku da dapat biasakan diri kot.. tak pon pelajaran jadi semakin senang.. tak pon pasal kurang pressure pasal time tu aku da jadi senior.. entah la.. aku pon taktau camner leh naik gila aku nyer results..
pastu last sem turun sikit results aku.. aku dapat 3.95.. sumer A kecuali B+ for chemistry.. damn!!!
tapi takper ar.. power gak tu kot..

pasal results sem 1 aku cam hempeh, aku tak layak la nak apply for any glamourous position.. they’ve set the min qualification was to get pointer above 3.00.. tak kesah la ko nak jadi LDP(lembada disiplin pelajar) or BWP(badan wakil pelajar).. results kena gempak.. so aku pon jadi la insignificant izuan for the 1st sem..
tapi aku takder ar loser sangat takder join any commitee ke ape.. i did join EMC(english motivational comittee).. i did not join, but was selected by the teachers la.. cewah.. bukan sumorang leh jadi EMC..tetiba nak bangga lak..
but its true la.. there was even an interview session.. i still remember, it was ms asyikin who interviewed me..and i was in the same group with aizudin and prasana.. and the 3 of us ended up being EMCs..
selain dari kitorang 3 org, mereka2 yg dapat jadi emc were ali, jesfiani, dinesh, faraha, maisarah, lutfi, a’an, shahrin, christina and last but not least shahira adibah…
aku rasa takder yg aku lupa..(kalau ader sorry ar)

the nice thing about mrsm is that we have a week in every sem where we were free from school/books stuffs.. it is called activity week.. sepanjang mggu aktivity, there were a lot of stuffs planned la for the students.. and we sure enjoyed the school-free week to the fullest.. most awaited week..
hehehehe…

there are so many things yg berlaku to me and if i were to say it all, it wud take me days to finally complete this post.. so disebabkan tu, aku akan hanya listkan saja keypoint2 nyer..
so kepada2 yg baca ni.. kalau korang paham bagus la.. klu tak, abaikan jer ar.. tak masuk exam pon.. ni sumer benda2 yg aku terlibat sama la..
the list starts with :

1. tayangan(wong sifu, bush dan konco2 yg terlibat)

2. STEM(sekreteriat tamadun melayu)

3. pekan rabu

4. outing
banyak jer leh citer pasal outing ni tapi aku penat dan malas..hohoho..

5. JSC

6. mahkota parade

7. ipin

8. bas melur

9. bangkai ( dier ldp senior yg paling cibai dan cibai dan cibai..)

10. shark dan teka-tekinya

11. interview proton yg pukimak.. tol tak odie??

12. kem motivasi kat ayer keroh kot

13, capub, mahadewa capub dan maharajadewa capub

14. alwi dan al-matsurat beliau

15. karnival sukan lenggong

16. jijik

17. pbsm, penyu dan odie masuk perbarisan.. muahahaha

18. menyorok lam store time rollcall pagi pasal takut kantoi ngn jijik sial

19. wong tak dapat jadi BWP, pastu kena pecat lak bila dah jadi LDP

20. panjat tangki air lama dan baru..intai pelajar puteri..pastu wong kantoi..

21. perang mercun laki pompuan..

22. azifah yg mengandung anak si botak..bodoh main tak pakai kondom!!!

23. dburn, dewi dan studio musik jadi lec hall..

25. dollah tokan komik..sumer jenis komik die ada..gempak, utopia, kreko, hype dll..aku pon tak igt dah..

26. ader sorang senior kena public canning pasal kantoi tgk blue.. tapi lupe nama dier dah..

27. dr. fatanah yg sungguh cool

28. citer hantu popular jasin pasal pompuan mengandung bunuh diri gantung kat kipas..who knows knows..

29. budak ex-gov vs budak ex-mrsm

30. clip2 video movie pendek made by our seniors and also our batch fellows..

ader banyak lagi sebenanyer.. kalau korang baca ni.. pandai2 la tambah ok..
kepala aku dah jammed cuba mengingat kembali..

after jasin aku masuk KMS(kolej mara seremban)..
most of the things are quite similar to jasin..but not really..
aku buat a level kat sini.. ended up getting 15pts..or 3A’s
samer macam kat jasin, aku nak listkan jer benda2 yg ada kaitan ngn aku time aku kat sini..ni takder turutan pon, which ever comes 1st la yer..

1. IRP

2. nasi lemak dan dadih koop

3. shisha kat senawang

4. zamzam, bola, epl, worldcup 06

5. snooker solid power

6. continous heartbreaks of mine..again, who knows knows..

7. pindah randah blok, dari amin ke fatimah ke amin kembali..

8. jamaica

9. pacific, nasi ayam piffy

10. ampangan, satay dan rtkd

11. wella

12. BTN

13. the hectic and compact last sem..kena study what-should-be-covered-in-1 year in only 3 months

14. dr syed.. dier saitan pasal potong rambut aku..sial!!!

15. terminal one dan wayang murah..

16. bowling kat seremban parade yg murah jugak..

17. jusco seremban 2 yg famous tu..

18. rumah wong

19. old traffort, bola petang2..

20. volleyball ngn dak2 ib and seniors

21. kucing2 DS.. ader yg mata terkeluar tu.. ish!!!

kepala aku pon penat mengingatkan balik.. hahahaha
ikut2kan banyak gila aku leh citer kat kms ni..
tapi takper ar.. aku rasa ni pon da cukup banyak dah..

pas kms, aku datang sini.. bosan ar nz ni.. malaysia lagi best.. huhu..
aku dah penat campor ngantuk ni.. so sampai disini saja post aku yg super panjang ini..
matila korang nak baca.. takder org baca kot..
tujuan aku tulis pon sopaya aku tak lupa kepada benda2 ni sumer.. dan juga untuk berkongsi ngn korang sumer ar.. samer2 ar kita mengenang2 benda2 ni..tak kira ar yg baik atau buruk ok..
okla, sampai disini sajer.. jompa laie..!!!

"10
yrs later,when ive grown whiskers and grown babies in my belly,i’ll
take time to wander through my posts,travel back to my youth years and
rejoice in the small simple things that make me a woman one day"

this quote i found when i went thru reading zra’s blog.. a question on why do people bother to write blogs..
of cos, it’s a woman’s quote and wudv been slightly diff if a guy were to say it..

but that’s not the main point, i’m just saying.. what she said is totally true.. how bizarre and weird it feels to remember back how our lives were 10 years back..

rite now, its 4.40 am in auckland and i just got out of bed pasal nak sahur.. yup..
aku nak sahor pasal nak puasa harini ni.. dan sambil i’m typing this, i’m munching the very-salty-but-sedap nasi goreng made by afiq and mon lastnite.. those 2 crazy blokes went cooking nasi goreng at 11pm lastnite.. sungguh gila!!! and the fact that i’m not feeling sleepy at all led me to another self-pondering-moment of mine and thus drove me to writing another post  pada pagi2 buta yg sungguh dingin ini..

i was planning to write about my youth.. how i was like 10 yrs back.. and before i go any further, i assure u guys (any loser who’s reading this, yes i am talking about u) that this entry is going to be very effing long..

now that i am 20yo..10 years back when i was ten.. all i cud think of rite now is that i was a prefect then.. schooling in sek keb wangsa jaya seksyen 4 wangsa maju.. i remember having a fight/brawl with that boy…shit!! i dont remember his name but still people called him anak maidin.. budak mamak tu.. it was during recess and kitorang bergusti, bertinju, berwrestling kat tepi longkang.. hahahaha.. how childing and stupid that is.. that was the first time i brawled with someone..
it was also the year when i first realise that as an anak melayu, i have to prove to everybody what i am worth, that being a malay does not make me less than those chinese and indian kids.. pasal ni la first time aku masuk kelas yg penoh ngn cina ngn kelly ng.. so i strived and worked hard.. and survived the very competetive class..
what i meant with survived is that i stayed in that clas(the 1st class) and not kicked out the next year..

the next year.. i dont remember much but i still cant forget how i’v been misjudged by my chegu kelas.. she somehow descriminate / doublestandard students.. nama dia pn.azizah.. no way i’m forgetting her name.. there was one time when something went wrong and she  accused me for causing it.. aku pon tak hengat what really happened, tapi still bengang pasal si azizah tu sedap2 jer tuduh aku.. luckily my friend backed me up.. kalau tak, mampos aku kena denda ke aper.. saitan tol!!!

and also in that year, i remember the class was moved to pusat sumber pasal the main building was going thru some renovation.. and one thing that i did, then got caught, thus spanked.. masa kat resource center tu, aku and some of my frens pegi rosakkan notice board pusat sumber tu.. hahahaha.. macam biasa la kat sumer sekolah.. kat depan kelas sebelah black board tu mesti ada space untuk tampal benda2 la.. seperti jadual waktu dll..
jadi kat pusat sumber tu ada la carta organisasi pusat sumber, dan yg paling atas(bawah guru besar sbnanya) tu ialah cikgu haslee.. cikgu lembut dari sarawak tu.. he was the one yg found out my frens and i yg bertanggungjawab merosakkan carta organisasi yg die buat tu.. he threatened that our lives wud be a living hell if we did not confess, my fren ni, feared of his threat tu, mengaku la.. then kitorang pon kena la spanked bersama2.. guna pembaris meter tu.. adehai!!! sakitnya bontotku..

kejap jer dah pjg aku tulis..
hahahaha…
what the heck… if noone wants to read it, i’ll just rad them myself..

ok2..sambung balik…
then darjah 6.. yg aku igt time ni aku dah tak sama kelas ngn izyan and rahim.. aku kena masuk 6 kenanga pasal ada la saper yg cerdik pandai yg sort out the students to their classes decided to have 2 classes of similar academic potential.. budak yg dapat 1st dalam darjah masuk kelas dahlia, yg 2nd kenanga, 3rd dahlina, then kenanga and so on..
aku dpat no 4 dalam darjah..cewah!!!
so aku masuk kenanga la..

aku taktau naper, tapi yg aku igt rahim ngn izyan jer dari sek rendah aku tuh.. derang dua2 dah masuk 2nd year dah.. rahim buat engineering kat uni of canterbury, nz.. izyan lak wat medic kat melbourne, tapi aku taktau uni aper..
dua2 pon scholar pet.. tu pasal derang awal aku setahun.. aku under mara.. preparation buat 1.5 tahun, masuk bulan 7.. derang buat setahun jer, tapi derang masuk guna results trial.. argh!! perkara lama jangan dikenang.. it was not such a bad thing to singgah sebentar di kms, was it??

lagi satu benda yg aku igt time darjah 6, aku dapat 5A time exam sem1.. i was the only one yg dapat 5A time tu.. i know it’s not a really big deal.. but it was the 1st time i ever beat izyan kat sekolah tu.. izyan tu mmg hustler gila kat sekolah tu.. dier nyer peratus markah tak pernah turun 95%.. cam sial jer.. time aku dapat 5A tu, ramai yg kantoi on subjek sains..tah camner aku leh dpt A pon aku taktau ar..

ok2, then masuk f1.. aku dapat offer dari VI ngn mrsm muadzam..tapi dua2 aku tak pegi.. sebabnye.. i just didnt feel like going.. cos i wanted to feel what it was like to study in a sekolah harian, just like my siblings did..
masa f1 ni aku ada gaduh gak.. dgn budak seksyen 1, tapi aku tak igt nama dia.. sebab gaduh pon tak beraper igt..
pastu aku dgn 4 org lagi kawan aku formed a group.. we callled it ’saif’.. which means ’sword’ in arabic.. tapi kejap jer pasal one of us, klu tak silap aku nama dia raissudin b abu bakar, he moved to another school.. too bad.. but i still think it’s worth mentioning his name, and also the group..

and also, in the very same year. i met new people and made new frens.. i even had my 1st crush on someone in this year.. her name is siti hanisah mohd rozaily yussa (SHMRY).. hahahaha.. tak sangka aku still igt nama dia sampai harini..
she too doesnt read my blog.. so lantak la..
lagipon, it was just a crush..

tahun ni jugak, aku suka pau budak2 kelas aku 20sen.. muahahaha.. aku ngn member aku ni la.. nama dia pulak muhd azri b abu bakar.. *amek kau.. ramai tol anak bakar lam kelas tuh!!!
pau budak2 lain duit, pastu gi main cc kat brj.. hahahahaha… kelakar gila bila igt2 balik..

my academic performance was deteriorating.. but i just didnt care cos i was busy having fun..

pastu time f2 kot, kitorang reramai tetiba minat gila main red alert2.. walaupon time tu RA2 tu dah kira basi gak la.. tapi tetiba kittorang minat main balik.. aku hustler gila main game ni time tu.. kalau nak beperang jer, konfem budak2 ni dah cop nak gang aku.. cewah.. angkat bakul lak aku ni..
salu gi main RA2 tu before kelas muafak mula..
kelas muafak ni kelas tambahan ar.. buat kat sekolah jer tapi di sponsor oleh satu yayasan org melayu islam yg dipanggil yayasan muafak.. byk jugak ar aku dapat benefit dari yayasan ni.. tak silap aku baweng(yg sekarang ni kat otago, buat medic) pon bekas anak muafak gak..

time lower form ni jugak la.. my brother initiated the formation of another gang.. we called ourselves "punkor" that is the abv of "punk ekor"..

the reason was because we once cut our hair mahawk style but kept the rear part long.. so jadi ekor la.. and as the name suggests, we were really a bunch of punks..
we did some awful stuffs too.. i’m not trying to brag of boast telling u guys what i’ve done.. its just a lil something that i wish to share with my fellows..

i remember my brotha and frens got caught stealing wallets at alpha angle, jusco wangsa maju.. then my dad found out, kitorang kena belasah cukup2.. aku pon tak pasal2 kena padahal aku tak curik pon.. my dad accused me of being an acomplice.. ceh!! baik aku curik sama.. kena belasah gak..
hehehehe….
not only mencurik, we used to cari pasal and gaduh with the public.. i remember once we stopped a chinese boy, and asked him for money.. but he refused to give.. then apa lagi.. kena belasah ar dia beramai2.. but he retaliated.. tapi pasal kitorang ramai, masak la cina tu..

i know, i was a jerk.. i was a kid ok.. so dont pin me too hard for doing what i did..

masa lower form jugak, i was a prefect.. and at that time.. teachers had always looked at us as the responsible and reliable ones.. they never questioned us for being late to class, or for not showing up to class at all.. they trusted prefects.. so aku pon mengambil kesempatan la.. i skipped class, especially kelas pend seni yg bodoh tu.. and sejarah yg sungguh mengantuk tu.. and i never got kantoi.. hahaha..

even after all the bad stuffs that i did when i was schooling kat sek men wangsa maju 2, i was still blessed i think..
i got 8A’s and 1C for my PMR.. my arab la yg C tu..
i thot i cudv gotten an A for my arab tapi tak dapat.. nak buat camner..

lam banyak2 aku citer ni, aku tak citer langsung pasal my sports achievements.. ok2, i’ll make it short..
time sek rendah i played volleyball, wakil sekolah..tapi kalah jer.. aku join atheltic gak, tapi bukan lumba lari.. lompat tinggi jer.. aku salu jer dapar pingat kalau masuk lompat tinggi ni.. time darjah 4 dapat perak, dajah 6 dapat emas.. time darjah 5 takder lompat tinggi.. bangang!!
ok, sek men lower form pulak, f1 aku takder wakil sek aper2. tapi igt aku dapat perak lompat tinggi..
f2 pon dapat perak gak rasanya.. then dapat wakil sekolah compete kat bukit jalil.. interzone kl..
tapi jgn harap la nak menang.. qualified to compete pon dah kira syukur dah tu..
then, f3 aku dapat wakil sek chess.. lawan kat VI.. pon takder menang aper2.. tapi ok la dari takder masuk aper2.. yg penting pengalaman tu..
pastu before aku blah dari sek wangsa maju ke jasin, aku sempat wakil sek bola tampar.. tapi kalah la jugak..
sumer yg aku wakil ni tak penahnyer menang.. suey tol!!!

aku rasa tu je kot memori kat sek wangsa maju 2.. aku nak tulis pasal benda2 kat jasin pulak.. there are so many things.. tapi pasal aku da ngantuk nih.. sambung later la ok..

to be continued….

hola to all..

as usual, im writing again due to this tremendous amount of boredom in my life..
the last couple of weeks i’ve been acting like a moron, wasting time day and night, doing nothing beneficial except chatting, makan, tgk citer korea and so on..

at the start of the cuti, i planned on doing a lot of things.. antaranya is to do research on my camera attachment project, trying to finally bake my own cookies (pasal dah kemaruk ngn mrs higgins yg sodap sangat tuh), and also trying out some of my mak  nyer masakan/resepi..
tapi semuanya haram.. hempeh kelapa dan tebu..
satu pon aku tak buat..
dasar pemalas gila punya olang.. tak ala sivik punya budak.. (aku gila tak semena2)..

ok2, this is not why i wanted to write a blog.. its just that now i am feeling sungguh happy, bahagia dan gumbira.. i just knew sumone..(who knows knows..)..
this someone has been the one that makes my day.. dia lah the one thing i look forward to this few days..
lord knows how much i yearn to be with this person.. i dont know why.. i just feel so much excitement and content whenever i think about this person.. dia memang membuatkan aku gembira.. gembira.. and GUMBIRA!!!

but at the same time, the fact that the cuti is reaching its end is putting so much pressure on me.. starting this 2nd hald of semester, i’m expecting evrything to be so damn harder.. the 1st half was quite a burden to bear..before the cuti, i was clueless and hopeless in everything.. MATLAB, electeng, design, and chemmat.. they all fucked me up..
i had once thought that maybe its just me who’s getting stupider pasal all of these subjects are giving me headache.. camsial tol..
never in  my life i felt so stupid and incompetent like this.. terasa seperti org bodoh yg menjadi semakin bodoh hari demi hari..
what a total loser i am..

cuti ni, i was able to escape the excruciating reality(that i’m getting dumber) cause i din have to think about study and the fucking MATLAB every single day, my life this last fortnite was such a bliss.. so the idea of coming back to being a moron, stupid, silly loser is not something i favor.. duh!!!
tapi i have to.. i have to realize that.. this is the kind of life that i have to make myself accustomed to.. aku ni bukannya putera raja or anak org koporat keparat yg mmg sudah kayakayaraya tu leh senang2 dok umah goyang kaki and get their ass fatter and fatter day after day…*melepaskan rasa tak puas hati dan cemburu pada anak org kaya

i am not from a rich family, so i cant expect my parents to suport the expenses of my life forever, tol tak? so aku kena ar study hard, get a degree, nice job and take responsiblity  on my life.. and if Lord permits, i wanna help my parents too.. like what faiz rahim said in his speech at the petunia farewell dinner.. walaupon dier tu suka wat lawak dan kelakar, tapi what he said in his speech tu mmg betol… i support him totally..

so konklusinya.. sekarang ni aku sungguh gembira, or more precisely, i am excited because of this special someone.. but at the same time, i’m getting this pressure from the idea of going to class and having to deal with C++.. the getting-harder-day-by-day electeng and the huge amounts of work due to my design projects… sigh!!! if only i have someone by my side to comfort me in amidst of all these stress..

but, i’ll try hard.. try hard to survive this coming 2 months.. then i’m off to my beloved hometown.. malaysia negaraku tercinta..
btw, i bought a royal brunei flight, worth nzd1409.36…. thanks to that someone yg told me about the murah brunei ticket..
okla.. chiow!!!

ps : i think she does not read my blog.. so lantak la.. muahahaha..